August 9th, 2010

Only in my wildest dreams would someone like him come in and tell me things like that...

  A usual in my Saturday ritual, I pulled myself out of bed, dressed, washed, and headed off for work. I couldn't help but feel excited as we drove, my two Aunts and I. I could feel that today was going to be special.

  The first few hours, as always, were very busy. There was always something that needed to be done whether it was re-stacking the shelves, tidying the display, helping customers, or cash (which, thankfully, I didn't have to do yet). Finally at around noon the crowd started to shrink, and, gradually, it faded away to nothing.

  "i'm going to head out for lunch now," I said as I took ten dollars out of the cash register.

  "Alright," said my co-worker, Tina.

  I walked out of the corridor and left into a large room lined with stands and busy people trying to sell what was left of their stock. I meandered along till I ran into someone I knew very well. 

  "M-Mark!" I gasped as my face met with his chest. "I- I'm sorry, I-"

  "No, I'm sorry, I - uh - wasn't watching where I was going."

  Unwillingly, but embarrassingly, I pulled myself away and took a few steps back. A long awkward silence followed.

  "Look," He started after what seemed like an eternity. "Your friend Matthew talked to me yesterday and he said a few things."

  Oh God!  He promised he wouldn't! "What about?" I asked, desperately hoping that my voice didn't sound as terrified as I felt.

  "Are you mad at me?"

  I thought long and hard before I opened my mouth. "Mark..... I am, and I'm not."

  "Why?"

  I drew a deep breath in an attempt to calm my nerves. "Because I like you and you led me on. I mean, if you didn't like me, why did you come to formal with me? You could have said no. I mean, it was the best night of my life and it's where I discovered that I think I love-"

  I stopped talking all at once. I took a deep breath hoping it would help me to shut up.

  "You thought I... Oh, Cazzy."

  My heart started racing. Terry and Alex had given me that nickname two years ago during drama the year they graduated. No one had called me that since. Hearing that familiar nickname calmed me down, but the way he said, so gently, kindly, (passionately?), made my heart burn with happiness.

  "I do like you. In fact, it's so much more than that." He paused, a light blush creeping into his cheeks.

  "What do you mean?" I asked, my voice came out small and scared.

  "I liked you from the moment I saw you." He told me, passion filling his voice. "But I didn't know how to say it and we were strangers. Then you came to the Summer Camp and I felt like I'd been blessed with a second chance, but I was too scared of rejection to say anything." He paused. "I saw the way you looked at me during the black light..."

  I felt my face turn a vibrant shade of scarlet, but he didn't stop to let me take care of it.

  "That summer, we hung out a lot, and I realized that I really like you but we were friends and I didn't want to ruin that. Especially after you told me about your father. I don't know, I guess I thought that you'd think I was no better than him."

  I was surprised. "How could you be as bad as him? You're kind and treat people kindly and with dignity. You're sweet, sensitive, passionate about what you do, you're nothing like him."

  He smiled. "But at the time, I was still so worried. Then, at callbacks for drama last year, when you told me that you liked me." - I shuddered at his use of past tense - "I felt like I was on top of the world. I didn't lie to you, I did want to give us a try" - the way he said 'us' sent a wave of happiness down my spine - "but I was still scared. I didn't want to blow it and risk losing you forever." He stopped and took a deep breath.

  "Then why did you go to formal with me?" I asked, a little bit braver than before.

  "Because I like... No..... Cazzy, I love you."

  I could feel my face flush, my heart stop beating.

  "I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to ruin our friendship. But, I guess I did that anyway... Look, I'll go and I won't bother you again. It'll be like we never met." With that, he turned and started off.

  "MARK!" I cried, feeling panic grasp hold of me.

  He stopped, turned around. "What?"

  "That doesn't work for me," I said as I ran to him.

  "Why not?" He asked, relief thick in his voice.

  I pulled away and looked him in the eye. His beautiful blue eyes shone brightly despite the dim lighting. They held me where I stood, warming me, wanting me, and, for the first time I realized, loving me. He hadn't been lying.

  I felt tears well up in my own eyes, but I pushed them back. "Because I love you."

  He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me, right there in front of everybody, but I didn't care. His lips were soft, and warm, his arms strong and loving. I knew from the way my body reacted with his that this was right. I felt whole for the first time in nearly six years when my father had taken away my beliefs that there are such things as love and happiness. 

  When we finally broke apart (which felt entirely too soon) we stood there and stared at each other. His hand found my face and gently pushed back a loose strand of hair. That one little movement sent shivers down my spine and my heart ablaze. I knew he could feel it too. He leaned in for another kiss, his warm breath meeting my waiting lips. "I love you." He whispered.

  "I love you too."

Then I woke up...

Author's Note

Pardon any spelling mistakes, I couldn't help but type this quickly. I didn't want to forget a moment. Comment, critique, anything you loved, didn't like, thought could have been better; I want to know.