Chapter 8

   I'm standing in the bathroom. Water drips down my back and into the towel wrapped around my waist. The showers are still on, reminding me that I'm not the only one here. I grab the scissors from the counter and straighten up. I see Drew watching me out of the corner of my eye. I find it insane how closely the staff have to watch you when you carry a sharp object. I sigh, and then I begin. I cut off chunks of my hair and watch them fall to the hard tile floor. I never realized how long my hair was until I could see my face. I set down the scissors and ran my fingers through my hair, processing it. My face is visible now. I slide the scissors across the sink and watch Drew pick them up.
   "You ready?"
   I nod my head and walk with him back to my room. I shut my door and head straight across the room to the dressers to find clothes.
   "You cut your hair."
   I turn suddenly to see Charlotte sitting on my bed, her pad and paper resting on her lap.
   "I'm naked." My voice is blunt.
   "It looks nice." She suddenly blushes. "Not, you naked. I meant your hair. I was changing the subject."
   I laugh. "Okay, whatever." I reach inside my dresser drawer and fish out some underwear, pants and a shirt. "Might want to turn around."
   She shields her eyes.
   I let my towel drop from around my waist and pull on my clothes. "So what exactly are you doing here so early?"
   "This project is basically our school time for now, so I'll be here every waking moment of the school hours."
   "You can look now," I said. I sat down on the bed next to her as she looked up. "Well, sucks you have to be here for what, six hours?"
   "Yeah, something like that."
   I fall onto my back. "Lucky you."
   She copies me. "I thought it would be nice in here."
   I laugh. "Nice? Yes, being locked in a room for hours is definitely my definition of nice."
   "You're locked in a room?"
   "The point of this whole operation is to gain back your responsibility and trust. If you do good, you get a reward for it. Me, I've only been here two weeks. There's never anything in it for me. Just this stupid room."
   "Well that's depressing."
   I look up at the ceiling. "More than you know." The bed shakes and I look over to see Charlotte has turned onto her stomach.
   I feel the soft tips of her fingers run across my neck. "Did those hurt?"
   "Some."
   Her fingers disappear. "How did you get them?"
   "Fighting."
   "Like for what?" She presses.
   "Like for drugs, for not paying the money owed, for messing with the wrong people." I look back up at the ceiling.
   "It seems scary."
   I look over at her. Her hair is mussed and in her face and she's chewing on her fingers. "What does?"
   "The whole drug scene. I mean, it's not like I never thought it wasn't scary before. But I never thought about something like that happening to someone."
   "I had a friend once," I began. "I met him in the drug business. He always stuck up for me, supplied me...we had trust." I raised my eyebrows. "Which in the drug world, doesn't really happen. But it did." I licked my lips. "He was killed."
   "Killed?"
   "Yeah. He didn't pay up to the big guy in charge. Unfortunately, the big guy in charge wasn't as trusting and friendly to him as I was. So he killed him."
   "Really?" She seemed surprised.
   "No, I'm just telling you this for s***s." I roll my eyes.
   "I'm really sorry." Charlotte brushes her hair out of her face. "You don't have anyone out for you do you?"
   I smile and turn to look at her. "Why, you scared?"
   She glares at me. "No. I'm just wondering."
   "Well, I do," I laugh. "Lots of bad guys who will kill anyone who knows anything." I widen my eyes for effect.
   "Oh, f**k you," she says, hitting me in the shoulder. "That's not funny."
   "I thought it was," I laugh. A knock sounds on my door.
   Drew walks in. He smiles when he sees Charlotte. "Hey. Sorry to interrupt, but Jude you have someone on the phone."
   I furrow my eyebrows. "Who?"
   "It's Theresa."
   I lick my lips. "Tell her I don't want to talk to her."
   "You need to talk to her, she's been worried about you."
   "Sure."
   "Come on Jude, just for a minute. She just needs reassurance from you is all."
   I sigh and stand up. "Fine." I follow Drew out the door and Charlotte follows me. We head over to the pay phone at the end of the hall and I seat myself in the stool. I pick up the phone and put it to my ear.
   "Hello?" I breathe.
   "Jude!" Her voice is raspy, probably from smoking. "My baby boy, how is rehab?"
   "S****y."
   "If I could I'd try and get you out, but I'm already out of money from bail for Issac."
   "It doesn't matter. I still have to be here, it was court ordered."
   I hear her cough hysterically on the other end. "Court ordered?"
   "Yeah, mom, court ordered." The word mom feels thick on my tongue.
   "Jude, baby, I've called your doctor but they won't tell me what's going on. Some stupid confidential s**t because I'm not your legal guardian no more."
   I begin making circles on my leg. Charlotte notices.
   "Yeah well, they said it's only about time."
   "About time? What the hell does that mean?"
   "It means like, four months." I rub my forehead and look at the floor.
   "Four months? Am I gonna be able to see you before then? Four months? such bullshit! Issac's cancer isn't even gonna take him yet. Why the hell does it have to take you first?"
   "Mom," I say. She's not listening.
   "I gotta get you outta there, let you live your life. Why the hell are they trying to stop all your crazy nonsense now when you're so close? There's no point!"
   "Mom," I say again. "Theresa."
   She stops talking. "Theresa? What, you're calling me by my name now? You can't even call me mother? I raised you for most of your life, don't you forget it."
   "I don't," I reply. "Trust me. It's practically written in my memory, ma."
   "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
   "Theresa, f*****g w***e, who you talking to?"
   I furrow my eyebrows at the voice being spoken on the other end. Theresa attempts to cover it up.
   "Go away Billy, I'm talking to my son here."
   "You got a son?"
   "Yeah, a god damn son. Now hold your damn horses and let me finish. I'll be there in a minute to give you your money's worth."
   Tears sting my eyes. "You know what mom," I say, "Just go ahead. I'm busy here anyways. Sounds like your client is getting a bit impatient."
   "Hey, don't talk to your mother like that. You know I have no other way of income."
   "By mom," I say, before hanging up the phone. I sit there for a moment, just staring at the ground.
   Drew cleared his throat. "At least she knows."
   I stand up. "Yeah, whatever."
   "Look, lunch is being served in about five minutes. How about you guys continue talking there?"
   Charlotte looks embarrassed. "Okay, sure."
   I look over at her, but she won't look at me. I can tell that was probably harder for her than it was for me. I blink away the tears that had begun to form and follow Drew and Charlotte towards the lunchroom.