Rainbow Sorbet

I wrote this a while ago. When I first wrote it it was about a boy and a girl in an ice cream shop discovering their love. But now I changed it to something more. A girl recovering.

    I stood on the other side of the road, my toes leaning dangerously over the curb we liked to sit on. The wind is awfully strong today. It usually isn’t this bad, especially nearing the summer. But unlike most of the others, summer was something I wasn’t looking forward too. I had nothing to do. It gave me time to think. To think about things I didn’t want to think about.

    I stared at the small ice cream shop across the small, one-way road. A yellow taxi drove by, Earl in the front seat. He used to drive us home every day after ice cream and the park. He stopped by the curb, rolling down his window. He didn’t ask me if I were okay, or if he could give me a ride. He just gave a soft smile and nodded. I watched as his car headlights faded. I turned my gaze to the sidewalk. To the curb. You sit there, your mouth slightly upturned into a small smile like it always is, your brown hair messy and in need of a desperate hair cut. But you didn’t care.

    I remember I used to nag you so much about it.

    Your face fades into the wind and I desperately wish I could conjure it back up again. I shut my eyes, squeeze them tightly, open. But you’re still gone. I look back up at the ice cream shop. We used to be best friends with the owner because we went there so often. She started giving us free ice cream. But then she moved, and someone new took over. She wasn’t as nice. I remember. I place my hands in my jeans pockets, even though they were too tight against my legs to even be able to fit my hands in. You used to nag me about that.

    You used to get rainbow sorbet. You made me try it one time, while we were sitting here, on our curb. It tasted like heaven. I haven’t gotten it since though. I haven’t been here since either. I finally got the strength to get up.

    “Hey!”

    I looked up; saw a young short woman standing just outside the door of the shop. She pointed at me.

    “Yes you!”

    As if I hadn’t known she was talking to me already.

    “Are you going to keep staring at my store? Because I’m getting ready to call the police!”

    A tear rolled down my cheek. They got a new owner after you left. She’s even worse. I cross the street and walk past the lady, stepping into the store. I go up to the counter, order a rainbow sorbet scoop in a small cup, one shake of chocolate sprinkles on top. You used to tell me that if you put the different colored sprinkles on top there would be too much rainbow, too much color, and too much flavor. I got the cup and sat down at a small table in the back. The lady at the front told me I had forgotten a spoon. It’s okay I hadn’t really meant to eat it anyways.

 

    I stared out of the window, missing your face, your kiss, your arms. You were always there when I called, when I needed your help. My bottom lip trembles uncontrollably. You used to tell me you thought it was cute. I hated it. I hate it now. I let the tears break loose but not the sobs. I scrunch my eyes nearly to a closure, hiding my face with my hands. My face is red I just know it is. I hate it. I wipe the tears with my fingers, staring out the window. I look at the rainbow sorbet. It makes me want to cry more.

    I get up, grabbing the sorbet and walking out of the door, the little bell ringing as I leave, just like it always did when you would open the door for me. I kept my lips tightly together so much it hurt. I looked both ways before crossing the street towards our curb. I stand there, sorbet in hand, facing the store. I can feel the rain coming. It starts off slow and then shatters down around me. It falls into the sorbet, letting the colors spread out.

    Don’t you think it’s time for too much color?

    My lip trembles. I sob. I kneel down slowly, setting the sorbet cup on the curb where you used to sit. My mind is such a blur of images that I can’t concentrate. I step off the road. A car horn blares. I scream and sob some more, stumbling back until I trip on the curb. I fall right next to the cup, the sorbet already nearly drowned by the rain. I lay there looking up into the rain. It falls into my eyes. I have to shut them. So I do. I wish I could have just lain here forever with you, staring up into the rain and eating rainbow sorbet until it was too watery to taste.

    I wish you could have been here for all this. You didn’t miss much though, I promise. Just the rain. Just the cold and miserable rain. I open my eyes, turn my head. I watch as a car zooms down the road, its red car lights dimming the further it got. I watched until it disappeared, just like I watched the back of the car that left you lifeless drive away down that same road. And now he’s locked up in jail, still alive. He shouldn’t be able to live when your life was taken from you. He shouldn’t still be able to see his family, his love, when you can’t anymore. He shouldn’t be able to have a heartbeat when I can’t listen to yours hum against my ear every afternoon we’d lay in the park after ice cream.

    I cry. I sob. Eventually I find the strength to get up. I leave the ice cream and head off down the sidewalk, leaving behind what I would find tomorrow. What I would find I don't really know, but I would always find you. You were always there. I know.