True Feelings

True Feelings

A Poem by {A}shley {B}lack @-;-
"

A poem to a close friend Which I've been allowed to share

"
True Feelings

your the light to my darkness 
the beat to my heart
your the only exception
I've loved you from the start 

Talented poet emotional art
hurts to see you go why must we part 
your my first waking moment 
my last before sleep
A longing to hold you
A feeling so deep 

So for now I must kiss you
a gentle goodbye
See you again soon my smile you provide


© 2011 {A}shley {B}lack @-;-


Author's Note

{A}shley {B}lack @-;-
You know who you are and you know the truth

please give honest reviews

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Featured Review

Pros: I can feel the emotion in this poem. It's sweet and gentle and caring; I like it quite a lot. The rhyme scheme helps it flow, but it has a natural flow of its own. These little scenes you create, I can see them quite well.

Cons: The second line in the second stanza and the last line in the last stanza are mildly longer (perhaps for rhyming reasons?) and kind of throw off the flow a bit.

Overall: This is a good poem :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I really like the first verse. As on opener, it made me melt. Amazing read.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Beautiful and sad To me this feels unfinished but I liked it a lot

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 4 people found this review constructive.

When I hear the phrase "only exception" a part of me melts and the rest of the message gets lost in translation. You could wrap any words of choice around that phrase and I would still love the entire thing. I know that isn't productive advice but it is honest!

Posted 13 Years Ago


great candid expression of a personal sentiment

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

ashley, you always told be to be brutally honest with you so I will... This poem sucks for your work... What the hell has gotten into you... the rhyms inconsistant. it lacks depth, and worst of all, its like you just gave up on it, and put a quick close... I don't like to give bad reviews but Bro. Wake up. you were asleep on this one. the onlything I liked was the subject matter so I am gonna get it a 90... Keep on working, and get some rest, try it fresh, let it shine. like all the other Ashley Black poems I have read... I hope you find this helpful

Posted 13 Years Ago


A very nice read, especially the last stanza. The only thing I could nitpick about would be the mix up of "Your" and "You're" Other than that, excellent :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


it was amazing, so full of emotions. i loved everything about it. you have such a way with words.

Posted 13 Years Ago


I enjoyed reading this (:

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

You should get these published in your own book or in a magazine the are so amazing, you poems

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

awww. so sad and so sweet at the same time

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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435 Views
20 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on January 22, 2011
Last Updated on January 22, 2011

Author

{A}shley {B}lack @-;-
{A}shley {B}lack @-;-

Sheriffhales, Shropshire , United Kingdom



About
I Am Ashley Black (an alter ego ) I have a dark mind when it comes to my poetry as the strongest emotions come from negative RETURNING- I have been distant from this site for a while but I am fina.. more..

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