Shadowed Innocence

The pain that glimmers in your eyes

Is as blunt as you are unique,

To see the misery pulse through your veins,

Inquires my tears to fall,

Fingers weaved through your mass hair

Teeth clenched, to restrain your screams,

To watch you be smothered by such hidden things

Drowns me in remorse,

Hate consumes the every emotion,

Confusion envelopes every thought,

Desperation to please,

to fill that vacancy of satisfaction,

lost in the memories,

and fooled by the dreams...

Reviews

[Dr. Robert]

Not too shabby. Overall I liked it, though some of the lines seemed a little stiffled and the flow of it was a little rough but overall not too shabby. Poetry can be so complex and it really helps when you read it out loud to yourself so you can understand the rhyme and meter of it. Excellent use of vocabulary. I see so many people pretty much repeating themselves over and over like they didnt have anything better to put in there. Poetry is all about using those words and rhyme and meter to convey that emotion to the reader, that is the most important part - that you convey the emotion to the read enough to touch them on a personal level. That is where the best poetry comes from. Keep up the awesome work and feel free to send some love back, I got a few pieces I need reviews on.