Privelages

i dont know. eating outside.

 

My legs feel the mud. But I guess it’s considered ground when it comes down to it. There are little blades of green coming out of it spearing you in the foot. But the grass just sticks to my socks. So I don’t wear shorts under my skirts. I'm clearly a s**t. Not that I’ll spell that out for you, but people have no f*****g idea what they’re talking about. Don’t take offense to anything. Wait, make that everything. Otherwise you're gonna take it personally. And rightfully so. There’s nothing stopping me from telling people what I think. I’m entitled to my opinion. And so are you. Do I express it more? Probably. That doesn’t mean I couldn’t care less. Ok. So it does. But not necessarily in all cases. Ok. Maybe. But would I lie to you? About this? Yeah. The probability’s dropping. If you’d care to notice.  Also, on top of that particular probability, I also have less and less of a chance of being talked to. Call me crazy. But now and again it’s nice to be civil to people you see. Oh. I don’t know. Five days a week? Minimum? At least once a day? Yeah. I know. It’s a lot to ask. But I would appreciate it. Not so much on the other end of the deal. But that’s alright. Everyone has that person. They can’t stand. If it’s me? Cool. I don’t think that’s ever happened with any sort of justification. Just let me know, ok? I like to be informed. Not only does it make me feel important but I am also partial to any sorts of attention on the DL. Like. DL attention. If such an animal exists. I doubt it. But I still like the idea. I hate walking in front of large groups of people. Talking in front of them? Not a chance. I don’t like when everyone turns to look. I immediately stop talking. Mid-word. I don’t know. Maybe I’m the reaction to my environment. Frankly, I can hardly get a word in edgewise, and mostly whatever I say ends up being used against me. So I don’t talk when I get home unless spoken to. I try to contain my occasional gushes and generally don’t spill. But it’s hard. Because it carries over into day to day life without me meaning to. Anything I say at home is strictly taboo and I don’t like people knowing too much about me through my telling them. Observation’s one thing. I like to keep some things on a strict need to know basis. Because it’s easier. And I don’t want to spill my guts and have peoples’ hands end up dirty. I couldn’t live with that. Speaking of which, there’s something wrong with having to sit on the grass in front of all these people. Even though they’re kinda sorta supposed to be my friends. I stopped believing that a while ago, but sometimes it’s just nice to be associated with them all. Yes. I’m totally crossing my legs.