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Please Review, First time, "The Bottle"4 Years AgoWhat am I chasing at the bottom of the bottle? Whatever it was by now I've surely swallowed. Now my body is heavy upon waking as I just crave relief My wallet is light from chasing my high by any means My moral compass changes as I run low on funds Now I'm contemplating doing things I never would have done. I hear a voice in the back of my head saying "Stop this isn't you!" But I've already gone so far I respond "What else do I have to lose?" I'm just another addict who resorts to the bottle when I'm in pain but how much longer before I'm dead or decide to change? Through wasted times I have lost my purpose Even the thought of life, well, it makes me nervous. The bottle was a thief robbing me of peace attempting and failing to use any substance as a release. I've been filling a void for so long the old me is lost Now though each day gets clearer and I'm no longer engulfed in a fog. With help I don't need the bottle to satisfy although at times I still think I do. I'm being taught that once I get it and the high passes I'll just be back to craving something new. I lived as an extension of the bottle but am now finding a new identity Knowing now beyond any doubt if I start using again my using will embody me The success I am aspiring to is now within reach, but I'm still hungry for more so I keep going to every meeting letting fellow recovering addicts move me forward. I tell myself that I've got to stay sober and I know I can "one day at a time" Those 5 words are what I grasp onto when it feels as though I'll lose my mind. All those past years I had spent wasted never essentially went to waste, for they can be put to use as an example of how not to live my old way |