Project Horror Writer's Review Forum For my reviewers

First, I want to thank everyone for their insight and comments on Breeder.  Believe it or not, I didn't realize there was a problem with the characters names until people commented on it.  I think what happened was that I was writing about Virginia while thinking about Elizabeth and everything got jumbled in the process.  But these are actually two separate characters in the story.

Many of you commented that you would like to see more detail, especially about the girl's room and I can truly appreciate this:  I understand that an environment can tell a lot about the person who lives there.  In the past, I have had several editors comment that I described things in too much detail, that I left too little to the reader's imagination.  Since this was a consistant critique, I began scaling back on some of my descriptions.  I now wonder if perhaps a bit too much.

How do you know when you cross over that line?  How do you know when to say when?  I plan on adding some more detail about Virginia's room but want to make sure I don't detract from the rest of the story by doing so.

Hmmm, it's always hard knowing how much is too much.  I gues it would depend on how much you would like to see in a story.  It is something that everyone has their own opinion on, some like a lot of description, others prefer very little. 

    Personally I think it is just a few personal things needed.  Is the room pink, indiactaing a girly-girly?  Are there posters on the wall?  If so what are they?  Not too much detail is needed, just say a Kiss poster on a black wall would indicate a more morbid and dark personality where as something like say A High School Musical poster on a pink wall would indicate more of a fashion girl.  I know those are two extremes, but I am just using them to show you whatI mean.  Does that make any sense? 

   For me it is always the smallest of detail that is added that really make a story and highlight a personality of a person much more than a long in-depth description of every item in the room.  I hope that helps a little.  XX

I started out as a very descriptive writer and had the same issue you did.  A lot of people say I got too descriptive.  However, one of those people finally made a lot of sense after reading a story of mine.  He said that you don't need to go into a lot of detail, just give a brief description of what you see. 

 

For example:  You walk into someone's living room, you're only in there a brief second.  Maybe you noticed an antigue, gold mirror on the wall, right over a desk lamp with the same designs etched in it as the mirror.  On the table that the lamp was on was a small glass with a few ice cubes in it and an open book next to that.  Next to the table was an old brown recliner that had a tear in the middle revealing the stuffing inside.  You also noticed that the walls had yellowed wallpaper on it that was peeling off in some places.  As you left you noticed a small, but full bookcase.

 

See, it's not overly descriptive, I didn't go into huge amounts of details about the mirror, or the lamp, though you know that they're old and are of the same design.  I didn't go into detail about what the open book was or what was in the glass, but you obviously know that this area, with the empty glass and the well worn chair is a place that someone spends a lot of time reading in.  Because the wallpaper is "yellowed" and peeling it can safely be assumed that this is an old house and with all the antigueyness(is that a word) you can probably assume that the owner of the house is an older person and because of the very full bookcase (another thing I didn't go into detail with because everyone knows what a bookcase looks like) the person is an avid reader or atleast a collector of books, but since there was an open book on the table he/she is probably a reader.

 

You see, very simple details tells you a lot about someone.  I didn't go into huge elaborate detail.  I didn't talk about the small crack that ran along windowsill behind you, or the broken leg on the coffee table in front of a couch that obviously had springs broken in it because it sagged in the middle and was covered with a dingy, lime green slip cover.  I didn't go into detail about these things because they weren't important, because they weren't what I noticed in the house, and they simply reiterate that the house is old and that the person living there must be an older person.

 

So, to bring this rant to a conclusion.  When describing things, there's no need to go into a lot of detail, just give us things that pops out to your character and not a full on description of the area they are.