Grigory Nehs

Grigory Nehs is the son of Gypsy immigrants whose grandparents fled to Appalachia to escape Nazi persecution during World War II. Unfortunately, they settled into a region that was notoriously cursed and all but one of their children died of Cholera. Nevertheless, they soldiered on, and decided to christen themselves true "hillbilles" by joining a local snake-handling church. It was a difficult time for their only child, Ishby, Grigory's father. He lost an arm in the coal mines, three toes at their church, and his right ear when he had to kill his friend Igor to win Grigory's mother's heart. She had deep, auburn hair, and hazel brown eyes. She was the daughter of indigenous moon-shiners. Her name was Katherine. She was immaculate. And so it was that the two were married and moved out of the coal fields. They produced seven children, but lost three. Grigory was the middle child.
He his nose, swallowed gravels because he believed it helped his digestion, ate dog food, and swirled in circles while staring at the ceiling. Whenever he tried to converse with adults, sounds such as, "Gvhaughat nareg youedge tzdoieng, vamaasz?" (Which translates as "What are you doing, mama?") So it was that his parents were deeply ashamed of the boy and wished to fix all of these harsh abnormalities that had fermented in their child. Alas, it was all in vain, for he stayed inside of his head all day long, imagined himself to be the owner of worldwide corporations, and created a machine the size of a football field that could produce a glass of lemonade. He pondered such profound questions as "Do girl's bathrooms really have couches in them?" As he grew, he began to become disillusioned with everything around him. He dabbled in nihilism, gnosticism, neo-Platonism, and occultist theories of how the world was created, but found no relief.
A Polish friend, Matthew, was one day greatly aggrieved with our dear Grigory's nonsensical analysis of Christianity. Matthew, however, was an Orthodox Christian and had a great knowledge of his faith. His replies rather impressed Grigory and Grigory asked whether Matt would let him attend a service. Upon entering the Church, Grigory felt his heart ascend into the heavens, escorted by Cherubim, and glimpsed God. His parents promptly disowned the boy after he came home ranting about his experience. His mother kept shaking her head and mumbling "My boy's become a communist... my boy's a communist..."
But a communist Grigory was and is not! He is a lover of Christ, a lover of Russia, a lover of absurdities, and Cheerwine. Perhaps you'll find some of his works edifying, perhaps you'll find them all pompous and overblown. At least you've found them.

Favorite Authors: Mikhail Buglakov, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Jorge Luis Borges, Milorad Pavic, Father Seraphim Rose, and Aldous Huxley

Favorite Poets: Nikolai Gumilyov, Sergei Yesenin, Anna Akhmatova, E.E. Cummings, Osip Mandelstam, Fyodor Tyutchev, and St. Gregory of Nazianzus

Favorite Composers/Musicians/Performers: Bach, Gesualdo, Schubert, P�rt, Shostakovich, Prokofiev, Schnittke, Gubaidulina, Khachaturian, Sergius Gregory, Lemeshev, Horowitz, Caruso, Gould, The Curtains, Owen Pallett, CFTPA, Xiu Xiu, The Kinks, and Sigur R�s