Brandi Delilah

I'm gonna tell ya right up front that I'm a b***h, but then you should have been able to guess that by looking at my picture. And they don't call us b*****s for nothing. My stud is a dog, too, but we ain't no AKC Obedience contest winners. We don't sit, get down, or heel, unless we wanta do it anyway, so you'd best not be barking out orders, because we might bark back, and Sambo don't mind biting ya either, if it suits his fancy. We don't take orders from any damn body, which may be why he did time recently in quarantine, down there at Animal Control. Well, they might as well forget controlling Brandi Delilah and her notorious aussie stud, cause we ain't gonna be controlled. I told him to leave the prissy poodle alone, but that b***h Ginger was in heat, and you know how stud dogs are. She's just a big clumsy b***h whose had enough puppies to open up a puppy mill. That b***h needs to be spayed.

Ginger is a Golden Retriever, and everyone thinks they are so sweet, so fine, and so pet and people friendly, but I'll tell ya right now that the b***h is more dog aggressive than either me or Sambo. She even tries to ride Sambo's a*s when they get out there in the kennel. he won't allow it, but the b***h sure tries. When she turned six years old, our alpha b***h pet guardian (I'll bite if you ever call that b***h my owner) decided to find a new home for her lover, Maximus, and have her spayed, but it hasn't happened yet, the spay thing, cause the b***h is still flirting with my man from inside her crate and kennel, and he's still trying to get some of that stuff, like stud dogs will. It ain't his fault; the b***h licks his balls, and sticks her wet a*s up in his face for him to sniff.

Well, that b***h who needs to be spayed, has been acting like a b***h in heat ever since Maximus got sent to his new home, and she even had the poodles down the street coming after her. No self respecting dog our size or larger, would even flirt with a prissy toy poodle, but Ginger ain't got no class, even if she is a Golden Retriever. She peed out there where all the dogs hang out, and had my Sambo going crazy. His lease happened to break, and he went after that prissy poodle, even though I don't think the dog was big enough to reach her tail end, anyhow. He was determined if he wasn't getting any of it, neither were those two brothers down the street, both prissy poodles, but things got out of hand, and he took a bite out of the old broad who claims she is the owner of those two clowns. The old lady was squealing, and holding the silly dog up in the air, acting like a pitt bull was after her. Well, all that screaming made Sambo feel like a pitt bull, so he acted like one, but he didn't have time to do much before our alpha b***h guardian got a hold of him by his waist, popped his snout, and carried him home.

The cops came by about an hour later to pick Sambo up, and if our alpha b***h owner hadn't got help from her rich family, he'd have received the death penalty. Dogs don't get no fair trial, and ya don't have to kill anyone, just biting is enough to get ya gassed, and the gas chamber is just what he would have gotten, all over that slobbering s**t of a Golden Retriever, panting around like she has some special power over my stud, when all it is was that she smelt like sex. He spent 10 days in guarantine, and now he has a dangerous dog classification, all for acting like a typical stud dog. But the old lady certianly took a bite out of crime, and I'd like to take a bite outta her, and put an end to both of those toy poodles. Ginger might like to play with toys, but I don't! I'm not homophobic, but if you're straight, you damn sure need to act like it. I'm from the old school, where dogs were dogs, cats were cats, and everybody was glad of it. Sambo don't chase no p***y, and those poodles shouldn't be going after no Golden Retriever, either, since she's big enough to be their guardian, just not smart enough to take care of anybody, even herself, even though everybody claims Goldens are so smart. Just cause she never bites doesn't make her s**t, it just means her bark is worse than her bite. Well, you can read more as the chapters of Dog Days of Summer hit the press, but for now, just know that I'm a b***h, and I don't eat no s**t like that Golden Retriever, who eats cat, dog, and even her own turds when she gets the chance. That should tell you something about how much of a bad a*s she really is. LOL. Later,

Brandi Delilah