Craig Rozniecki : Writing

Girlfriend Application (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

Girlfriend Application (an excerpt from my book, T..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Girlfriend Application Name: (Note: If your name is Halle Berry, you automatically qualify.) Age: (You..
Advertising Slogans With a Twist (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

Advertising Slogans With a Twist (an excerpt from ..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Advertising Slogans with a Twist Due to my love of language, ambiguity and sarcasm, whenever I hear certain advertising slogans while..
Intentionally Misinterpreting Statements As Being Literal (from The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

Intentionally Misinterpreting Statements As Being ..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Intentionally Misinterpreting Statements As Being Literal I enjoy being a pain in the butt sometimes. I enjoy being creative, am a bi..
Singles Ads I'd Like To See (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

Singles Ads I'd Like To See (an excerpt from my bo..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Singles Ads I'd Like To See Sometimes I'll rummage through the singles ads, because some of them are rather hilarious. I read throug..
The Top Ten Signs He's NOT "The One" (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

The Top Ten Signs He's NOT "The One" (an excerpt f..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


The Top Ten Signs He’s NOT “The One” 10. Whenever he hears Beck’s song, “Loser,” he excitedly yel..
"Snow Reduces Visibility," Eh? Duh... (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

"Snow Reduces Visibility," Eh? Duh... (an excerpt ..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Snow Reduces Visibility,” Eh? Duh… So, I just saw a headline on The Weather Channel which read, "Snow Reduces Visibility..
Commentary (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

Commentary (an excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hear..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Commentary What did everyone think of the book or author? “I feel dirty after reading this.” - Prostitute ..
Misusing Words (there/their/they’re, your/you’re, then/than and to/too/two) (The K-Heart

Misusing Words (there/their/they’re, your/yo..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Misusing Words (there/their/they’re, your/you’re, then/than and to/too/two) I’m a bit of a spelling and grammar gee..
 "Being gay is like smoking, eh? Me thinks not." (excerpt from my book, The Kind-Hearted Smartass)

"Being gay is like smoking, eh? Me thinks not." (..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


Being gay is like smoking, eh? Me thinks not. When interviewed by ThinkProgress earlier this year, social conservative leader (Iowa F..
What If the Shake Weight, Kay Jewelers and Cialis Joined Forces to Make a Holiday Commercial? (KHSA)

What If the Shake Weight, Kay Jewelers and Cialis ..

A Story by Craig Rozniecki


What If the Shake Weight, Kay Jewelers and Cialis Joined Forces to Make a Holiday Commercial? Personally, I think the shake weight ..