I don't know, I think sometimes people are way better actors than we realize or give them credit for, Christians in high numbers among them. I've seen depressed people of any religion, they think they're good at hiding it, but not around me, cause i'm completely anti-everything, so I bring out the worst in people, cause I inspire honesty. or maybe i'm giving myself too much credit lol. I agree with you though, for the most part.
yeah pretty much... I mean, I haven't seen in use in living, at least unless you have money, and that's just to buy yourself what I call "distractions" things to keep your mind occupied so you don't have to think about how pointless and meaningless it all is. you ever here of that book "work would be great if it weren't for the people"? well I came up with my own version called "life would be acceptable if it weren't for the people". people suck, at least most of them, one might say especially those in power cause they're the ones telling everyone what to do and how to do and are making poor judgment calls with their rules, however the lowest classes of people are the other half of this chestnut, cause they're all dumb and don't make any effort in life and take advantage of the system by getting SSI for overeating or having too many babies without making a rational decision about it. who has a kid without thinking first "can I afford my own food?" anyways, my point being that life is useless, and the only point I can see in any of it is to do whatever it is you're here to do even though none of us knows what it is, and getting the hell out of here, cause if hell exists, it can't be that much worse, especially for people living in third world countries.
i've been asking myself that for about 20 years man, though it feels like more sometimes lol. anyways, it's all relative i suppose. like the saying "s**t happens", or you could take the whole "chaos theory" into account. the point is, whether it's "damned if you do, damned if you don't" or simply "be good to by brother, and be paid in kind" or however that one goes, i find myself no longer really caring, so long as it can get to the end faster or more smoothly.
who knows? my theory is more like whatever we haven't done or suffered in past lives, we must suffer now. imagine each life has it's own blueprints, and has it's own ups and downs that you must experience and learn from before you can finally stop coming down to earth, then imagine you and i treated certain experiences like questions in a test at school, saying "next" each time certain things came up, and finally we're on our last run now and we can no longer say next, and thus have to experience all the worst choices we didn't make before saved for one long excruciating experience. that's how it seems to me anyways, but again, who knows?
that's such a lame answer on her part. that s**t is restricted to me, only I can be so unanswery, not a real word but I can't think of what word i'm thinking of. and anyways it's not it's just that i'm better at it than most. I don't think it's pms though, pms just makes girls more emotional, what she's doing sounds more dismissive and mysterious, like she's got something to hide. i'd definitely keep two eyes on her, as often as you can spare them. like Gandalf watching Frodo but not for the same reasons lol.
if like someday makes sense i'll be thrilled. i'd love to know all this stupid bullshit in my life had some great meaning behind it. even if I have to die to understand it. like i'll stand before god, and he'll say "travis my boy! good to see you back! so I need to have a word with you son, troubling thing, but it's over now, you're ok. all that stuff you went through, it's over now, and let me tell you why." and then he'll go on a longwinded explanation, and when he's finished i'll be like "really? so I just had to go through all that stuff so i'd know what it's like and won't have to go back to that stupid place and do it again? cool. thanks god, high five!" and then we'll give each other a high five and go on our merry way through the gates to heaven and everything will be just fine.
as far as the girl thing goes, some people are good actors, especially online. i'm more negative in real life than online for example, and more shy. I wouldn't talk much if we were face to face, and what I would say would be negative bitchy stuff. though if you two were planning on dating, it does seem a little odd for her to make THAT dramatic of a change, but who knows right? have you asked her about it? not straight out of course, but maybe mull it over in your head and right it down until you can get the words just right, then memorize your notes, and ask her.
and my life never seemed to be destined for anywhere either, especially not anywhere great. it's like i'm not here on any important mission or anything, i'm just here, and I have to go along for the ride. the worst ride ever attempted lol
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