瓦砾卡夫卡 (Kafka of the Rubbles)

己の珠にあらざることを恐れるがゆえに、あえて刻苦して磨こうともせず、また、己の珠なるべきを半ば信ずるがゆえに、碌々として瓦に伍することもできなかった。
——中�™�敦 《山月记》
I dare not endeavor to perfect my gift, as I fear the revelation that I am indeed mediocre; Yet, at the same time, therein my heart lies the hope that I may really be gifted, and so I refused to associate myself with mere rubbles.
(Atsushi Nakajima, Moon Over the Mountains. Translated by me)

灭六国者，六国也，非秦也。族秦者，秦也，非天下也。
—―杜牧 《阿房宫赋》
Who destroyed the Six Kingdoms? The Kingdoms themselves, not the people of Qin. Who eradicated the Qin? The Qin themselves, not the rest of the world. (Du Mu, The Tale of E-fang's Palace. Translated by me)

--
When one read great literatures and books, one--okay, *I* am bound to be struck by whims to write, all in a fervent state of admiration. Unfortunately, I am only adept in writing streams of consciousness, so streamy of consciousnessy, that a few would realize how I deliberately eschew objective descriptions.
In an act of shameless temerity, I think I could crudely imitate some of Kafka's literary styles. At the same time I am aware of how I am equivalent to an easily-excitable casual gamer--compared to precious stones, I am but mere rubbles. And so this is how I got my penname.

I habitually take the direction of horror stories, or at least, absurd tales. My aspiration as a writer is to complete this satirical comedy YA fiction named The Fantastic Story of a Girl Who Is the Chosen One At Her 16th Birthday and She is Going to Save the World Against Her Arch Nemesis And Of Course She Wins in The End (full-stop is not included). I am, of course, being serious.

The writers I admire are Franz Kafka, Osamu Dazai and Terry Pratchett.
The tales and books that I treasure are In a Penal Colony, Metamorphosis, No Longer Human(人间失格), Moon Over the Mountain(山月记), The Wee Free Men, The Complete Manual for Suicide, Strange Stories from a China Studio (柳斋志异) and etc.
The stuffs I am looking for are Dostoyevsky's Crime and Punishment, Akutagawa's stories, and Nakajima's stories.

**Thank you Bungou Stray Dogs for rekindling my love for books even with distractions from video games, TV, and life's incessant demands of attention.

I speak English, 也谙中文。