Philip Gaber

I hate writing biographies. I was one of those kids who rode a banana seat bike and watched Saturday morning cartoons and Soul Train. But my mother would never buy any of those sugary cereals for us kids. It was always Special K. Gross. I was a s****y student and then I met Rock and Roll, and he’s been my lifelong friend. I went to a couple community colleges but never got a degree. Then I talked my parents into sending me to film school at the School of Visual Arts, Left after two years. Then I spent the next thirty years working in a series of jobs until I got a job as an instructor for Goodwill teaching the skills employers were looking for. Then I got sidetracked and turned to a solitary life, where I met another friend named Alcohol. I spent 7 years drinking, sitting on the couch and watching movies and old TV shows. Now I’m mostly sober and employed as a security professional. My job title says I’m a concierge. Silly to me to call a security guy a concierge, but whatever…