The Blue Elk

This I wrote in a moment of anguish

I awaken to the sun shining on me. My vision is blurry, my body is heavy, my head is light. Finally things clear up. I see the dream catcher above my bed, the crystals glycening. I look to my right and see the bottles of whiskey next to me. Next to them are the thick stack of divorce papers. I just lay there for a moment. Then I remember...

I feel a sharp pain in my head. It came like lightning when I began to remember. I fell out of my bed with a huge thud. The bottles fell onto me. I felt the weight of my being force me down. It took everything I had to get up. 

I stagger to my window, piecing my night back together. I recall the courier bringing the documents to my door, me driving to the bar, and taking that first sip of alcohol. I walk over to my desk and pick up my pill container. I can only stare at them, thinking about what they have done to me, my career and my marriage.

I walk over to the porch and stare at the lake below. The memories of buying this house came rushing back. The process of picking it out, the details of the furniture, the smell of the place once we were finally done unpacking.... These were the good times.... the times before I was diagnosed. 

I see the winding staircase leading down to the lake and think of all that we had planned, all our work fixing up the place, the love we made..... Then I remember it all being ruined in one instant. I look at the pills again. I remember the doctor telling me what I had. I remember the reaction of my wife, I remember the pain it brought her. Things only got worse after that day. I throw the pills through the window, the glass falling outside. The rampage that ensued was nothing short of destruction. I tore the room apart, my rage fueling me. I finally stop. 

I am breathing heavily, sweating, then I look out the shattered window. I cannot believe what I am seeing. It is beautiful, yet terrifying, elegant, yet… I cannot help but go towards it. I go slowly, step by step, trying not to scare it away. Making my way down the stairs, my eyes are locked to it. It glares back at me with almost a remorseful gaze. I am so close, I can almost touch it.

I hear a crack, as I look down I see that I stepped on a branch. When I look up, it is in the distance. I chase it, trying to catch it, to prove it is real; I must prove it to myself, that I am not crazy. I must prove to myself that I am only having a bad dream, that I will wake up and my wife will be there.

I get closer, and closer, it is within my grasp. Then it jumps, and I jump after it. The creature is flying, I cannot believe it. Then I look down and see that it did not jump, but that I had fallen. What I failed to realize was that I had ran nearly a mile, to the cliffs. As I fall, time stands still. I think about everything, my wife, my home, my life. The ground gets closer, and closer…closer…clos…

Then there was nothing.

Reviews

[Ice QueenJen]

This gave me chills towards the end, you just never know what can happen from day to day either. Also great picture of a blue Elk too.

[Blue Elk]

Hey, I'm the guy who drew the Blue Elk picture. Got chills man, I had just left my wife of 20 years and was in utter agony. Some kind of magical artistic emotional communication happened to put that picture on this story.

[YouoweYoupay]

Amazing glimpse of real life infused with fantasy and a bitter distortion of memories! Well? Was it a dream?? I will never know for sure! But all I know that I was with you all the way, you have sucessfully and compeletly grasped my attention as a reader. Thanks for sharing! Keep writing.

-youoweyoupay

[HorrorMaster]

Very interesting. I like it.

[Havatara]

It's really, really interesting. I caught a couple of things, though. In the first paragraph you spelt glistening as glycening. Another thing, which I may be wrong, but unless you're a pro wrestler or Superman, I don't think a window would break from throwing a pill bottle at it. Other than that this is a great story.

Happy Holidays!

[Art Sun]

nice work...you did an excellent job carrying the reader from beginning to end...nice...

[Jenny Nelson]

Definitely interesting. Quite perfect description of ultimate despair. My heart goes out to anyone feeling anything close to this. Well done.

[Cats Eye]

This is very interesting peice, once again I am at a loss for words

[SR Urie]

Hi SF,
Interesting write, full of imagery and emotion, and an unexpected climax. No gripes over spelling or punctuation, and you built a good setting from the ground up; nice work.

You left a few things out (if I may). Why did the wife leave? What terrible disease would break up a good marriage - AIDS, Cancer of the nads, TB, Alzeimers, or even scitzophrenia? And the elk, what did it look like? Where did it come from and where did it go? Why was it there and what was the reason the main character - not too much description of him either - had to chase him to ultimately fall to his death? What was at the end of the fall other than his end - rocks or spiked trees or ice or some kind of troll with a deadly hunger for crazy, drunk, divorced men? Details my friend, along with the emotion and the memories and the ultimate end of our 'hero.'

Good write, sir. Keep it up! BZ

[Anthony M Smith Jr]

I feel like I am out of breath. The story could be a beginning cause today it appears that human suffering is exposed more than it has in the past. I know people who have opted to exit this life on their terms. Explaining their reasoning when it boiled down to their own choice. Like being born once we all die once. Its the time between we have the luxury of choice.
Good story my new friend. I have been very busy with my tribal ways and just lately getting the time to relax and read all my 150 plus read request's! Kind of like my early Christmas gift.
Life and Light to you and yours!
TT-TTO-NI-K
Elk